Fed up over weight girl

I'm in my bed thinking about April 9th. That's the day my new weight loss journey begins. But for some reason this sense of fear is in me. I feel like this is my last chance to get this right. The past 1 year for some reason my body (mostly my mind) does not want to cooperate. 

Do you ever feel like you just might not make it? The thoughts of being overweight this summer is paralyzing. 

I don't want to hide behind long, loose granny dresses, or have to wear blazers to cover my bulges. I HAVE TO LOSE THIS WEIGHT. It's do or die time.

These are my thought before I pray and then go to bed. Goodnight. 

Yours truly,

Fed up over weight girl